Jerk

A rooster jumped up and bit my elbow today. <insert profanity here>

Walk away you <insert same profanity here>.

More than three days later:

His name is Trevor. I named him after he bit me.

I've watched him from afar and decided he is a rotten jerk.

He sees food coming, grabs it in his mouth, and then takes off running with a group of ladies chasing behind, too slow to catch the GIANT hunk of bread that rotten scoundrel can't share.

Today he walked up and took a banana from me that I had sitting on the side table. Good thing I didn't want it since I had just eaten two. I was a little happy when the ladies showed up and the jerk tried to run, but since bananas weigh more than bread it kept breaking and falling out of his mouth. He was forced to share if only for simple physics.

Jerk.

I've decided instead of thinking we need to eat him next I'd like to keep him around. If only for entertainment purposes.

Jerk.