“Take your time,
and don’t crowd the chicken.”
That was the sum
total off all the advice the internet gives on making fried chicken.
“Slow and steady
is best. Oh, season the flour.”
That was some of
the advice my Mom gave me on the subject.
When I was
standing in La Sirena (Dominican Wal-Mart) in front of the chicken with
Michelle, I had to decide the kind of chicken I was going to use. According to
my mom, “Boneless cooks faster, but bone in is more "authentic" and
usually it costs less.” It was decided, if I was going to tackle making fried
chicken for the first time, I was going to go cheap and authentic. I decided to
purchase one whole chicken. Bones in.
Michelle and I
brought home our new bird “friend” and set him on the counter. “Okay Amanda.” I
repeated to myself. “Take your time, and DON”T crowd the chicken” He was
looking pretty crowded in that package, so I jumped right into Googleing how
to cut a whole chicken chopping up that bird.
It didn’t take
long for me to decide I knew what I was doing. I’ve seen southern women fry
chicken before, and I had been reading up on the process all morning. I was
stacked full of advice from my mother, and I had a roommate who believed in me.
As I was cutting
up this joker I repeated lines from websites I had read all day so as to appear
to know what I was talking about. “The breast should pull away from the rib
cage pretty easily.” Also, “The joints are easier to cut than the bone, so you
should feel for the sweet spot.” I’m sure I sounded like I’d done this a time
or two. Maybe that was the point. I had to psyche myself into knowing how to do
this. 
When the little
guy was cut up I set Michelle to making a liquid sauce while I made the batter
mixture. It was a simple flour, salt, pepper, and a little bit o’ chicken
seasoning, but I was pretty proud to have done it. Michelle whipped up an egg,
milk, and hot sauce mix for the liquid part.
Michelle didn’t
know how to make fried chicken, and I was only 86% sure I knew how, so the
cooking process was a little scary.
Steps to
chicken:
1.
Coat
in dry batter
2.
Let
the chicken sit
3.
Heat
oil. Don’t heat it too hot. Try the bread crumb thing.
4.
Place
a few pieces of chicken in the liquid
5.
Remember
not to crowd the chicken
6.
Coat
the liquid guy in the dry batter again
7.
Remember
to take your time
9.
Remember
not to crowd the chicken
10. Let the guy cook
11. Remember to take your time
12. Consider turning on the show FRIENDS
13. Turn on FRIENDS
14. Wait a few more minutes
15. Flip the chicken
16. Wait again
17. Find a paper towel
18. When the chicken in golden, not burned,
and cooked through put in on the towel
Now is about the
time we realized the chicken might take a while. I think I knew. I was “taking
my time” and I didn’t ever “crowd the chicken”.
We finished the
meal off with rice and broccoli, neither of which I cooked. Michelle was a
great partner in the cooking experience. We both took on foods we hadn’t ever
cooked and it turns out we are pretty skilled. The meal was worth the wait, and
for me it was nice to spend way less money on this meal than we typically do
going down to the local pica pollo joint.
Now, I was
thinking about watching FoodInc tonight, but maybe I hold off on that one until
a day when I am not cutting up the breast of a bird.
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